The Problem With Perfectionism

The Problem With Perfectionism


perfectionism is the unreasonable and
self-defeating ambition of getting something absolutely right – which makes
us difficult to be around and punishing to live within. The origins of
perfectionism lie in the imagination. In the ease with which we can conjure up a picture of an ideal state of affairs compared with the monstrous difficulty
of bringing such a state into being by ourselves. The sickness of perfectionism
just states in a fertile gap between our noble visions and our mediocre reality
and yet our problems do not ultimately arise just in our love of perfection.
They lie in our reckless tendencies to under-budget for the difficulties of
achieving perfection. The proper target for gentle criticism is premature
perfectionism. How accurately we budget for time and effort is always dependent
on a proper grasp of the inherent difficulty of any task. If we fully
recognize something to be exceptionally difficult
we don’t panic when our first efforts are weak and progress slow. It’s difficult
but we knew it would be. High standards only become a problem when we think
something might and should be substantially easier than it turns out
to be and when we read our struggles as marks of our own ineptitude rather than
as an inevitable part of a legitimately lengthy journey. Perfectionism is only a
problem because we have under-budgeted for difficulty not because we are aiming
high. It strikes when we imagine we might write a good novel in six months or have
a good career by the age of 30 or have worked out spontaneously how to have a
successful marriage. our perfectionism starts to torture us
when we lack information on how hard others had to work and how much they had
to suffer before reaching their ideas of perfection. In a better world culture
would endlessly draw to our attention the first draft and hidden labors of
other people and properly alert us to the true horrors exacted by anything
worth doing. We would not then be so impatient and such sickly perfectionists.
We would be patient resilient Questers for excellence. The problem isn’t that
we’re aiming for perfection. It’s that we don’t have an accurately redemptive idea
of what perfection really demands. At the School of Life we believe in developing
emotional intelligence to that end we’ve also created a whole range of products
to support that growth find out more at the link on the screen now

One thought on “The Problem With Perfectionism”

  1. Perfectionism has NOTHING to do with excellence. Perfectionism is the utter fear of being thought a failure, and thus, being unloveable. Perfectionism arose with Protestantism and their deep desire to control nature.

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